Bruce Gone to Pot

We do not want to sound alarmist. The Prime Minister has not taken to smoking ganja - at least there is no public admission that he does so.

It has been reported that when under stress, the PM takes to the kitchen and puts all his troubles in a pot and somehow gets relief by watching the flames do their job. In a sense the PM has admitted that like Capleton he is also a fireman. Just picture Bruce with the pot boiling, the flames lasting and saying to himself:

"Bun bad mind, bun bad budget, bun bad luck, bun Eddie!"

Not unlike a number of herbalists, Ras B finds some soothing relief in lighting up - raising flames. Such does not augur well for the Cabinet.  For example, can you imagine the trepidation felt by the Ministers when the CS invites them to lunch and says that he will be cooking?

That the CS resorts to cooking when under stress has some unintended consequences.  For example, Bruce will be in charge of the catering for the four day Cabinet Retreat.  Who will be the uncut members of the kitchen cabinet? Some have no doubt gone to pot, either smoking or sitting.

Bruce must be selfish in that stress release initiative for it is said "too many cooks spoil the broth". The country is anxiously awaiting what he is cooking up.  If the stress continues, then he may just open a cook shop.  Some may say that he is already running the country like one. IMF stew is on the menu.

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Lies & Dyes

We have serious concerns when it comes to political credibility. Some of the key actors in thhe Bruce Goofing regime seem to have been typecast for the roles they have been performing on the national stage. Here are just a few examples as there are  a wide pool from which to choose:

Political credibility must be strained when:

• a jamaican politician says he has never used “bad words” a.k.a. indecent language?

• a Minister sports a hairdo characterised by a less than symmetrical division between dyed black and dyed white?

• a speech is touted to be of “national importance”, but was delivered in the wee hours of the morning and contained nothing which would have been uncomfortable in a mundane government press release?

• a politician claims sensitivity to the cries of the people who he had just made into weeping minions?

• a Minister would have us believe that the entire cabinet sat and deliberated a tax package without considering the political ramifications?

The latest one is the spin that the government knew that it was not possible to effect the tax on electricity consumption before February 1, 2010; yet allowed the prime Minister to declare in two national addresses that the entire tax package (including the electricity tax) had to become effective January 1, 2010?  That would make anyone—even the Prime Minister use colourful language.

Speaking of which, some JLP leaders have been quite adept in their use of hair colouring. One even had a nuanced rainbow colouration that varied from month to month. Another apparently economized by sharing his wife’s. They made a matching couple. Those old enough will recall the replacement of official photographs which had white hair with ones suitably altered or dyed replacements.

But the JLP government is not alone.Whilst there may be fanatical loyalty to party colour, hair dye runs aplenty untribalized.The geriatric nature of the Opposition PNP fails to be camouflaged by the liberal application of hair dye. The preference hair here seems to be white.

Since there is a general reluctance to implement term limits, then there could an easy solution: hair dye retirement. Can you imagine how many would run afoul of such a standard? By one count nine members of the opposition would readily qualify and at least two in the Senate.

Some politicians might just opt for the bald head approach; even more so after a less than Ruddy happy experience with dye. Shouts of “shower” may send both sides scampering for cover.

Guess it is just a case of our politicians dy(e)ing to serve the people. You had better believe that!

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